"This then is the message which we have heard of Him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in Him is no darkness at all." 1 John 1:5
John was a man that was in the presence of Jesus for three years, day and night, sleeping together, eating together, healing those in need, teaching the foolish and religious. John saw all that Jesus did and heard all that Jesus said, except when he wasn't present with Him. There wasn't much that John did not know about Jesus. He had seen Jesus teach in the synagogue, speak to thousands, heal the sick, cast out demons, give people hope, forgive sins, and He watched Jesus interact with all types of people, from the kings to the poorest lepers. John was in on the parables to the people and the interpretation of to the disciples. John was there when Jesus went to the mountain and was seen in His glory with Moses and Elijah present. John heard the voice of God. John really knew Jesus and was born again into the kingdom just like you and me. If anyone can declare God, it is John.
The point is that John says that "God is light and in Him there is no darkness at all." I believe it.
This light that God is is more than light in the way we think of light today, even though we know from scripture that the light that God is is so bright that you cannot look upon Him. But just the same God is the light of revelation and grace and mercy and righteousness, and forgiveness, and tolerance, and love, and faith. This light that God is lives inside the heart and mind of the believing person. You have this light in you if you are a child of God. And this light shines and shows the way. This light is God in us and through us. This light is the working of the indwelling Holy Spirit in the hearts of men and women, teens ans children.
"And in Him is no darkness at all." God is not the author nor the distributor of evil among mankind. God cannot do what so many uniformed Christians think He can. God is the Father of lights and the giver of all that is good. If you have a skewed view of God due to having been taught by those who have skewed view of God, you will not understand the events in life nor will you be able to receive all that is available to you. God does not bring sickness, disease, pain, calamity or tragedy of any kind at any time to anyone. All the evil that befalls us from one of three sources:
1 Our own free will
2 The fall of man
3 The devil and his demons
You are not getting a message from God to step outside of the will of God to have something or someone you want. If it was from God it would have all the natural and righteous trappings that accommodate a gift from God. It would bless you and bring blessing to others without hurting or denying others their fair due. It would resemble what Jesus would do and it would shine like the light. It would be something you can share with your church and something that you need not hide from your son or daughter, husband or spouse. God is Light and in Him is no darkness at all.
Let the light of Jesus shine through you into others. Look to the Light for your direction. Follow the Lighted pathway that God has prepared you for and prepared for you.